Author: PeteBrown

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England Ukraine update

There was a bit of debate the other day about how pubs might stream the internet-only game tomorrow.

Well tough shit to everyone who thought there was a way. According to The Publican, pubs are actually BANNED from doing so. Venal bastards Perform – the rights holders to the game – have mandated that the game cannot be screened for “any commercial purpose whatsoever” and will be checking the IP addresses of people who fork out for the game to ensure that pubs are not accessing it.
According to the greedy C***-in-chief at Perform, they looked at the possibility of streaming the game into pubs and decided it was “not viable”. So if you’re one of the people who said it could be done quite easily, Perform say you’re wrong.
No doubt rubbing wads of tenners around his scrotum while he did so, the git claimed that England fans have responded to the company’s sucking out the soul and spirit from our national game in a way that he is “encouraged” by.
If you’d like to discourage them future highway robbery, please go here and tell them how wrong they are.

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Things I should have posted over the summer no.1: Adur Brewery

It’s been a privilege over the last four months to travel the length and breadth of the country doing signings, readings and tastings to promote Hops and Glory. I’ve met new people and made new friends, and made many mental notes to blog about some of the fantastic beers, brews and people I’ve met. I’m embarrassingly late on this and now, finally, have time to do a bit of catching up. My appreciation of the Crown Brewery and Hillsbrough Hotel, Acorn, Thornbridge, Lovibonds in Henley, Nantwich, the fantastic Welsh brewers at Abergavenny, beer and food dinners with Purity and White Shield, and trip to Belgium will all be up in the next week or two. But let’s start with the Adur Brewery down in Steyning in Sussex.

This was quite special in a number of ways. Andy Dwelly was on holiday a couple of years ago, reading Three Sheets to the Wind. And when he got to the end, he decided to set up a brewery. I never imagined I might influence someone to do something so drastic!

My Hops & Glory tour coincided with the brewery’s first birthday, so I thought the least I could do was go down and help them celebrate.
The brewery itself is right in the heart of the South Downs, in an outbuilding behind a big house down a leafy, quiet, single lane road. You’re right out in the country, and this gives the whole place a very mellow, relaxed feel.

Andy makes several beers – I started off with Ropetackle, a 3.4% golden ale that’s doing incredibly well in the local community, then Velocity Bitter (4.4%), Black William Stout (5%) and the Trappist-style St Cuthman’s Red Wheelbarrow (10.5%). I’m ashamed to say I’ve lost my tasting notes, but from what I can remember all were very good indeed. I quite like the branding too – each label is based on a local historical figure or event. There are some cool designs, all quite different save for the common identifier hidden somewhere in the picture – a red and white jester’s hat.
And Steyning is a lovely village/town. The local bookshop did the best display of my books I’ve ever seen:
and we got a great attendance and sold lots of copies at the event in the evening. It was one of the best events I’ve done.
Adur feels like it’s still in a start-up phase with the inevitable growing pains. But what struck me is the friendly spirit around the town and the brewery – it feels like an active part of its community, with people popping in to help or just to say hello.
The list of where the beers are stocked is already pretty impressive after such a short time in business. I’m sure we’re going to be seeing a lot more of Andy and Adur in the next year or two.

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Losing the plot

So the England Ukraine World Cup qualifier this weekend is only going to be shown over the internet. And if you only decide to watch it on Saturday, it’s going to cost you £12.99 for the privilege.

Given that England have already qualified, no broadcaster wanted to pay the asking price for the rights to show it.

This must be one of the most ugly, stupid, venal, blinkered, cruel, callous, cynical, nasty, plain fucking daft decisions ever taken in sports coverage.
Apart from the obvious social exclusion here – if you’re not affluent enough to have a decent computer and broadband internet connection, tough shit – this move will cost pubs millions in lost revenue. Not everyone likes watching a big match in the pub, but many of us do. When places are rammed with fans, you get a special atmosphere that simply can’t be replicated in the home. You get a sense of community and companionship that’s all too rare these days. I’m not sure if pubs would even be permitted to try to show the game through a laptop. But it would probably be pretty rubbish even if they did. Anyone who wants to watch the game will have to do so sitting at their pc.
Given that England have already qualified, can I suggest that every England fan who cares goes to the pub when the match is on anyway, and spend your money on beer instead of with these greedy bastards?

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Britain’s National Drink – the new Cask Report launches today

Cask beer – or real ale – is outperforming every other beer style. It’s returned to volume growth. The number of women drinking it has doubled year on year. It creates a unique ‘value chain’ that helps pubs become more profitable.

All this and more is featured in the Cask Report, which I’m launching with a press conference at Brew Wharf tonight.
This is the third year I’ve been invited to write this annual report, backed by micro, family and regional brewers, Cask Marque, CAMRA and SIBA. I got paid for writing it – hell, it takes four months to do – but I strive to remain independent while doing so.
The first cask report (then called The Intelligent Choice) showed that cask ale wasn’t doing quite as badly as everyone thought – it was declining by no more than the beer market generally.
Last year we showed it was declining at a much lower rate than other beers.
This year we’re revealing what will hopefully become a return to volume growth – cask grew by 1% in the first six months of 2009, and current trends suggest it will show a full year of growth by December. Remarkable given all the shit pubs are currently having to contend with.
This demonstrates that the taste for craft-brewed, flavourful beer is no longer confined to a beardy few. Great beer is going mainstream, and that’s a good thing.
The challenge with all this is persuading a few more pubs that there’s something in it for them. cask still sells at a lower price than most beers on the bar. Great for those drinkers on a tight budget, not so great for the publican who’s struggling to make a living.
The Cask Report reveals that cask ale creates a value chain that brings more affluent drinkers to the pub, more often and in greater numbers, who spend more money on everything – not just cask ale – while they’re in there. I’m not arguing that decent cask ale pubs are immune to recession, but they are closing at a much slower rate than pubs generally.
Please read the report, or at least the press release. Tell your friends. Tell your local publican. You rarely hear any good news in the broader beer market these days – and this really is great news.

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Tokyo* Supermarket Sweep

I know I know… I should be blogging about Nanny State. But I need to try some first, and I’m a bit busy.

Anyway, I was just very briefly revisiting Tokyo* because I’m giving it a mention in a big piece I’m writing about beer marketing for a Sunday newspaper magazine (yep, you read that right – one of the biggest papers in the UK has actually commissioned an article on beer).
Anyway, for this, I wanted to do an accurate comparison of pence per unit of Tokyo versus other stuff. I’ve seen Brew Dog and others do comparisons of how much booze you can get for the same £9.99 price tag as a bottle of Tokyo, but I don’t think anyone has worked out the precise unit comparison I may be wrong – apologies if you have and I missed it).
Anyway, I found an alcoholic unit calculator, looked at some offers on supermarket websites, and got a bit more absorbed than I needed to for the feature I’m writing. So I know Tokyo* is old news and has been blogged to death, but I thought I’d share it here – if you live in the constituency of one of those Scottish MSPs who signed the motion against it, please feel free to copy this to them:
  • One £330 ml Tokyo* contains 6.1 units – at £9.99, that’s 0.61 units of alcohol per £1
  • Blue WKD is in Asda – three four packs for a tenner. Even with the alcohol level having been recently lowered to 4.5%, that’s 1.4 units per £1
  • The standard price in Tesco for 24 x 284ml bottles of Stella is £10. At 5%, that works out at 2.39 units per £1
  • Promotional prices on Stella over the last 12 months have reached as low as the equivalent of 67p per pint. That’s 4.5 units per £1
  • Tesco Currently has a really nice offer on a lovely-looking Kiwi Sauvignon Blanc – six bottles for £23.52. The wine is 12.5%, so that’s 2.84 units per £1.
  • Morrisons is currently flogging Grants Whisky for £12.99 a litre. At 40%, that’s 3.07 units per £1
  • Even Carling – hardly a drink that’s going to get you smashed in a hurry – gives you more bang for your buck – Sainsburys is flogging 15 x 440ml cans for £10 – at 4.1%, that’s 2.7 units per £1.
So let’s summarise that, in order of units per £1:
Tokyo* – 0.61
Asda Blue WKD – 1.4
Tesco Stella (normal price) – 2.39
Sainsburys Carling – 2.7
Tesco Kiwi Sauvignon – 2.84
Morrisons Grant’s whisky – 3.07
Morrisons/Asda/Sainsburys Stella (promo price) – 4.5
WKD gives you more than double the alcohol for your £1. A fairly common offer on white wine (I checked out several other deals that came in similar) gives you 4.5 times as much alcohol per £1 as you get from Tokyo*. When it’s on promotion – which it will be again for Christmas – Stella gives you 7.5 times as much alcohol per £1 as Tokyo does. If you want to get wankered cheaply, Tokyo* is rubbish – it’s worse than even Carling.
Of course, it’s not all about price. There are issues about it being one serving, and about general perceptions of how strong beer should be, versus wine or spirits, based on how we normally drink them.
But pricing comparison is crucial because the anti-alcohol lobby that is attacking Tokyo is the same anti-alcohol lobby that wants minimum pricing and duty increases on alcohol… because they think higher prices will deter binge drinking.
And with that feat of deduction, it would be nice if the neo-prohibitionists would finally disappear up their own arses.
Or at least admit the total and utter logical incoherence of their argument.

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This is not just beer… it’s cider as well

(Declaration of interest: I have not been paid to write about this. But I was paid last year to consult on the strategic thinking that led to the range of beers and ciders discussed here. I am proud to have been involved. Read this knowing that I’m not entirely impartial.)
Supermarkets are in the main depressing places for beer fans. Beer is piled high and sold cheap. It’s often sold at cost price or below – its sole function is to get people through the doors. I’ve spoken to big brewers who say that if supermarkets could take it off the shelf once you’re through the door, they would. Once the beer has got you in, they want you to buy everything else except the beer. That’s why it’s always at the back of the store.
And what about quality beer? Well, they’ve always stocked a refreshingly broad range of bottled ales, but chains such as Asda and Sainsbury’s are now cutting back their selections.
Where supermarkets do stock good beer, the range is hopelessly confused. You get categories such as canned lager, bottled lager, world lagers and speciality lager next to each other. Umm… so what do world lager and speciality lager come in? Bottles. So why is bottled lager a separate category then? Umm.. dunno.
In my local Morrisons small bottles of Heineken are in bottled lager, and 660ml bottles are in world lager. No one knows why. Beers such as Chimay, Hoegaarden, Groslch Weizen and Sierra Nevada Pale Ale are stocked in speciality lager, even though they’re ales – the latter even says ‘pale ale’ on the bottle! But these are foreign and therefore fashionable beers, and ale is British and farty, so we can’t possibly have it with the ales.
The whole thing is a muddle, and it just confuses the shopper. No one does beer justice. Browsing time in the beer aisle has been shown to be shorter than that in any other aisle. Supermarket buyers have told me they would rather work in crisps or pet food than beer, because it’s more interesting. What a mess.
Worst of the lot was M&S – if you could even find the beer range in store, it was a few random bottles under the mixers and alcopops. It was the last area in store to hark back to the old days of M&S when they used to have St Michael’s branded stuff that was designed to look like a copy of a leading brand. You had the Stella copy, the Holsten copy, the John Smiths copy… even some of the brands they were attempting to be copies of had long since had their day. I was asked to do consumer interviews in store, and when we looked at the beer range, it was so bad, it brought down the image of the whole store in people’s eyes.
We recommended to M&S that if they wanted to be taken seriously there had to be a big enough range to allow people to browse and make an informed choice. We suggested a diversity of styles, with plenty of information for people on what the style was, what it tasted like, with a food matching recommendation on the back. M&S felt strongly that apart from beer style, the range should be organised according to provenance – each beer taking the lead on where it came from. They made a commitment to source each of the beers from the place it said it actually came from.
At this point I bowed out, having done my bit, and they went away to talk to suppliers, sourcing the beers, deciding on the final range. Brandhouse, the agency I’d been working with, did the label design and the overall look and feel for the range. I’ve had no further involvement. But after my last presentation about a year ago, I thought that if they were brave enough to do half of what we’d suggested, they’d have the best beer range of any supermarket.
Well, they’ve done a lot more than half of it. Yesterday, with my beer writer’s hat on (it’s kind of like a trilby with all stains on it and a couple of badges) I was invited with other beer writers along to a tasting of the new range that launches in store over the next few weeks.
There are about thirty beers and ciders. At this stage they’re brewed all across the UK, Ireland, Belgium, Spain, Italy and Germany. Each beer tells you where it’s from. Each beer is brewed by a reputable brewery and they’re upfront about who brewed what. These may be M&S own label beers, but they are quality beers.

I started off on the Belgian lager. It was soft, bready and hoppy – and reminded me of what another Belgian lager used to taste like about ten years ago. Very nice indeed. I then tried the Czech lager, which was quite different – more spicy and herby on the nose and more assertively hopped on the palate. A definite difference between two lagers that taste of lager.

There are five or six ciders, catering mainly to the mainstream but with a nod to quality. The Breton cider was a revelation – only 2%, a bit too sweet for me, but very refreshing and crying out to be paired with something rich and creamy.

There were German wheat beers (very good) and Belgian Tripels (not so good) but the range focussed on British ales. Here again there were good and bad, but the who notion of local sourcing combined with style information works really well. So the ‘Staffordshire IPA’ was brewed by Marston’s (why not call it Burton IPA though?) the London Porter was from Meantime, and so on.

It wasn’t all perfect – some of the beers just don’t work for me, and others were just… OK. The Christmas ale was trying too hard, the Kriek tasted too industrial. But there were some absolute stars. The Cornish IPA, brewed by St Austell, was already part of the range and is a standout. I loved the Scottish Heather ale and was surprised by how roundly and maltily satisfying the Lincolnshire bitter was. The chocolate porter, from Robinsons, is incredibly audacious – it just tastes like fizzy drinking chocolate, and I think that’s probably not a criticism.

The design is interesting and there are definite female cues on many of the beers.
The full range is only going into the biggest stores, but more space will be devoted to the range in store across the board. Over time they’re hoping to add some American beers, and hopefully the few lame ducks will be replaced as the range settles in and they see what’s selling.
Everyone will have their likes and dislikes here. But what’s brilliant is a premium retailer really taking beer seriously, making a very firm commitment to treating beer as a quality product to be explored and appreciated, rather than an industrial commodity. Hats off to ’em.

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It’s a Dog’s Life

What better way to spend a Tuesday afternoon than visit the nicest pub you never knew about, drink some fantastic beers over a hog roast and watch your dog be utterly humiliated?
Meet Captain PBBB – the final member of the PBBB family:

Captain is a rescue dog, and we’re not quite sure of his progeny – we think he’s a Yorkshire terrier mixed with a Shitsu or laser apso. In other words, Yorkshire with a bit of ponceyness mixed in – just like his master.
On the scale of doggie hardness, Captain marks out one end of a continuum of which the foam-flecked, wild-eyed hounds of the Flying Dog Brewery‘s labels pin down the other:
But the two ends met yesterday at an event to mark the launch of an expanded range of Flying Dog beers in the UK, including two of their best sellers – Doggie Style Pale Ale and Gonzo Porter – now being listed in over 300 Tesco branches across the country. (Of course, in Tesco it won’t have the words ‘Doggie Style’ on the label – after all, that would bring about the collapse of civilisation).
I’ve always liked Flying Dog and have visited the brewery when over at the Great American Beer Festival. We went out drinking with them one night and all I can remember is my sides hurting from laughing. Their beers are excellent – not the most envelope-pushing ever, but American craft brews don’t always have to try to reinvent the wheel. A small range has been available in the Uk for a few years, and when I was touring Three Sheets to the Wind three years ago, doing events with a selection of beers from around the world, Gonzo Porter – inky like alien blood, full of spicy chocolate malt and yet at the same time a Cascade hop bomb – converted a surprising number of women to beer for the first time. It’s great news for any beer lover that this and the pale ale – zingy, hoppy, but light and perfectly balanced – now have such wide distribution.
And it turns out that Flying Dog are more experimental than their limited (till now) range in the UK would suggest. I’m looking forward to trying my bottle of the 11.5% Double Dog Double Pale Ale I scrounged from lunch. We tried a German-style smoked lager that can be enjoyed even when you’re not eating bacon – so an improvement or a ‘dumbing down’ on German smoked beers depending on your point of view – mine is certainly the former. And we heard great things about a new Belgian-style IPA, which isn’t bottled yet. Good luck with the Portman Group over the name of that one when it does get over here, guys.
The event was in the Spaniard’s Inn, on the north-west side of Hampstead Heath. I’ve never been there before but it instantly became one of my new favourite pubs. It’s an M&B place, and within that group it’s the only pub other than the famous White Horse that has free rein over its beer stocking policy. A great range of draft and bottled beers – Doggie Style was on tap, along with the great and good of English cask beer and a few new ones I’ve never seen before. And a fantastic food menu with dishes like slow-cooked lamb shank, pearl barley and creamy mash and organic pies at prices that are lower than some really dreadful wannabe pubs I’ve visited recently.
And my new test of a pub menu – a Ploughman’s should have ham and cheddar in it. So why do pubs normally ask you to choose between the two? Why do they not even give you an option of paying a quid extra and having both? A good pub is one that does both on the plate. The Spaniards goes better: a choice of two from rare roast beef, honey roast ham, Cropwell Bishop Stilton or mature Cheddar – for £7. I’ve paid more than that for some pretty dire city centre Ploughman’s before now.
The building itself is centuries old, and rumoured to have been a haunt of Dick Turpin. Dickens visited, but Dickens seems to have visited every single pub that was standing in the Great London Area at ay point in the ninteenth century. Whatever, The Spaniard’s age, affluent location and basic pub infrastructure combine to make it a blend of gastro and traditional boozer you rarely see pulled off so successfully. Other nearby pubs have gone down that infuriating route where they still insist on calling themselves a pub even though they ask if you’ve booked a table as soon as you walk through the door. The Spaniards is definitely, 100% a pub – albeit a pub that did 700 covers for food last Sunday. As pubs that Dickens has visited go, just thinking about how this place compares to the Anchor on the Thames makes me want to cry.
The location means it’s popular with dog walkers, and you can even buy boutique, artisanal dog food and treats at the bar. Sounds a bit poncey, but if you believe your dog deserves as nice a meal as you’re getting, well there you go.
Proximity to the Heath means some of the dogs must be a bit muddy sometimes by the time they get here – and that’s why, at the bottom of the car park, there’s a Doggie Wash. In goes the dog, up go the screens. A few tokens from the bar and your dog has the pleasure of shampoo and conditioner, rinse, cold air blow down and warm air blow dry.
So yeah, nice pub, great beers and everything. But the true highlight of the afternoon was this – a mutt who won’t be inspiring any Flying Dog beer labels any time soon:
Heh heh heh.

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Beer World Cup – the next round

My Market Kitchen appearance was broadcast last Thursday night, so I can now reveal that, as some people guessed, I squeaked through the first round of the Beer World Cup versus Germany.

The competition breaks down into two parts: a blind tasting of the two beers before we get there, and a studio debate on whose beer culture is the best. The audience score both parts and the combined score produces the winner. Schiehallion actually lost out very narrowly to Paulaner lager in the taste test, confirming my suspicions about how to play this tactically with a mainly female audience not that into beer. I very narrowly won the studio debate.
(Sample dialogue:
Sabine von Reth: “In Germany, in the army you get two litres of free beer every day. The British army doesn’t have this.”
Matt (our chair): “Pete, what do you say to that?”
Me: “If you’re British, don’t join the army. Go to the pub instead.”)
Overall, I won and went through. But I think it was by the very narrowest of margins. Sabine was great. She runs the Bavarian Brewhouse in Old Street, London. They’re currently having an Oktoberfest there, with bands flow in from Munich. I suggest you go. I will be.
Anyway, next week we record the semi-final. I’m up against America, so this could get messy. I don’t know the person I’m up against, but they could bring either the blandest, most boring beer in the world or something very good indeed. What will the audience go for? Will they recognise greatness?
I need to choose another beer to go up against them. And if I get through, I need a range of six beers for the final. I can’t duplicate beers. So do I sacrifice one of our finest beers for the semi, choosing something I believe can beat whatever the Yanks throw at us? Or do I save the best for the final and play tactically? And why is British beer culture so much better than American beer culture?
These are the questions that will preoccupy me till October 7th…

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Well that was nice. What next?

Nearing the end of my four month promotional tour for Hops and Glory, which will no doubt come as a relief to regular readers of my blog.

Yesterday was a good day. I arrived in Nantwich, Cheshire, to speak at the food festival here and help judge CAMRA’s Champion Beer of Cheshire at the beer festival. About an hour before I went on stage, I got an e-mail from my editor with lots of very good news in it.
First, sales of Hops and Glory are about double what I thought they were. In four months, the £14.99 hardback has sold more copies than the £10.99 trade paperback of Three Sheets ever did. This book has been an obsession since the night in the pub when the idea presented itself to me uninvited in December 2006, and will be until my final reading date in a few weeks. It HAD to sell. And it has. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed it, blogged about it, tweeted about it, recommended it, joined the Facebook group for it, booked me to talk about it, and otherwise help promote and sell it. I feel like I’ve got to the top of a mountain I’ve been climbing for three years.
One of the main reasons it has succeeded is the fantastic cover. And the next bit of good news is that the artist responsible for designing it has been commissioned to redo my previous two books. Man Walks into a Pub, now six years in print, has sold an extra 1500 copies this year, which is amazing, but every time I see its horrid sub-powerpoint clip-art cover I wince. In June 2010, the paperback release of H&G will be accompanied by new editions of MWIP and Three Sheets, and they’re going to look stunning as part of a set – my beer trilogy. It also gives me the opportunity to update the text of MWIP – bringing the final chapters on the state and prognosis of British beer and pubs up to date, quietly getting rid of some factual inaccuracies that have been pointed out to me, and deleting a few of the gags and footnotes that are trying a bit too hard. The question is… will I temper the scathing criticism of CAMRA that won the book its initial notoriety, now we’re on more friendly terms?
More good news: some good feedback on H&G from GABF – so North American readers may finally get to see the book after all without the seemingly controversial tactic of buying it from Canadian Amazon.
What next? I’m about to start work on a non-beer book. Feels a but weird but I want to spread my wings and try to achieve recognition as a ‘writer’ (whatever that is) rather than simply a beer writer. Before I get irate comments from beer bloggers, that’s not to dis beer writing or suggest it’s inferior to other forms of writing – it isn’t at all. But it does have a very narrow appeal in the book-purchasing world. I’ve been trying to change that as hard as anyone else who puts fingers to keyboard, if not harder, and I will continue to do so. But there are maybe three or four people on this planet who can make a decent living from writing about beer and nothing else, and I’m not one of them. I’ll continue beer blogging and journalism, and may even have two or three nebulous future beer/drinks ideas gathering traction in my addled head. But changes in personal circumstances mean I will soon be able to afford to write pretty much full time, and I now have to start thinking about all this in terms of career progression, skills development, broadening areas of expertise etc.
Next week (October 5th) sees the launch of the new Cask Report. It’s the third year I’ve written this, the definitive guide to Britain’s cask ale market, written independently with third party research, but paid for by a group of major regional brewers, CAMRA, SIBA, Cask Marque and Family Brewers of Britain. I’m better known for this now in the brewing world than I am for anything else. And there’s some major good news for anyone who loves cask beer, and important new findings for any publican thinking about stocking it.
I’ve got a load of catching up to do on this blog – I’ve spent most of the summer travelling, meeting people, being invited to brew, taste, and judge beer. I’ve been holding some of these pieces back because I’ve been trying to sell them to ‘old media’. I have totally failed in this respect and so will put them on here. I know blogging is ‘supposed’ to be a short-form medium, but I’ve got some longer, 1000-word features that I can’t place anywhere else and I don’t want to waste. If you strongly believe blog entries should only ever be short and sweet, I invite you to completely ignore them when they appear.
And I’ll post the first one just as soon as I get back from day two at Nantwich. Day one was a tough crowd – they didn’t warm to my opening gag about Brazilian prostitutes…